


He Learned it from the Pizza Man

by Moonclaimed



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Except for all the plot and the startling lack of porn, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Humor, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Spanking, The Pizza Man, sorry mom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-08 22:21:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1958250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonclaimed/pseuds/Moonclaimed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean licked his lips nervously.</p>
<p>They had it all set up. They had talked about it—kinda anyway—and had already done that whole I-love-you-forever-and-a-day please-never-leave-me chick flick crap. And they had even rented a room so they could try this out without Sammy walking in when he really wasn’t needed, and now…</p>
<p>Well, now Dean realized there was only one more important question left. Something he really should have cleared up years ago.</p>
<p>“Cas?” He asked as he stared up at the hotel’s water stained ceiling. “Are you still going off of what you learned from the pizza man?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Learned it from the Pizza Man

**Author's Note:**

> This is the obligatory My Friend Demanded Smut For Her Birthday fic. This is my attempt to meet that demand. 
> 
> As I've never actually written smut before, it apparently turned out more fluff/humor then smut, but I tried. :)

Dean licked his lips nervously.

They had it all set up. They had talked about it—kinda anyway—and had already done that whole I-love-you-forever-and-a-day please-never-leave-me chick flick crap. And they had even rented a room so they could try this out without Sammy walking in when he _really_ wasn’t needed. Condoms and lube were neatly set out on the nightstand and clearly labeled, and now…

Well, now Dean realized there was only one more important question left. Something he really should have cleared up years ago.

“Cas?” he asked as he stared up at the hotel’s water stained ceiling.

“Yes, Dean?”

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep, fortifying breath. “Are you still going off of what you learned from the pizza man?”

Cas stilled from his spot between Dean’s knees. “Should I… not?” The silence after seemed contemplative.

Dean knew that silence. His eyes flew open and he flailed to sit up. “Cas, don’t you dare!”

Cas, the little bitch, dared. With a quick movement highlighting all at once the eons Castiel had spent as a warrior and the fact that, wings or no, he was still far stronger than any human, he yanked the underside of Dean’s right knee up and over so that Dean was all but hurled belly down on the bedspread, his face mashed into an over-soft pillow. Cas leaned down over his sprawled body and breathed, damp and slow against his ear, “I believe in the pizza man’s message, Dean.”

That had _no right_ to be as hot as it was.

But there was something… something prickling at the back of his mind about that particular B-rated movie. What had it…?

Dean’s question was answered when Cas’ steel limbs went from passively impeding his movements to being active restraints; the smaller man pinned Dean’s legs down with a knee over his shins, held his torso where he wanted it with one light hand on the back of his neck so Dean was effectively bent over, head down with his ass in the air.

“H-hey!” Dean yelped as his pants grew suspiciously tight. “I don’t think you really get how this whole sex thing works. Not everything you see in TV works in real life!”

“Quiet, Dean. I am going to show my affection for you now,” Cas said in the same deep, level voice he always spoke in. Not out of breath, or husky, or anything.

That also had no right to be as hot as it was.

Dean shook his head to clear it. “But I—ah!”

Dean blinked against the over-starched cotton of the bedspread. “Did you just _spank_ me? Cas, sto—ah!”

“Based on the content of your hard drive,” the angel explained as he gave another firm swat, “you enjoy when light corporal punishment accompanies sexual gratification.” He paused. “I also enjoy it.” And he swatted again.

“Dude! You can’t just—you are _doing this wrong!_ ” Dean panted as he wrenched his head around to stare accusingly at Castiel. Judging by his expression, Cas was not convinced. “I’m even still in my pants, Cas. This isn’t how you—hey, stop that!” he flailed as Cas, taking his advice, stopped long enough to flip Dean onto his back and fumbled with Dean’s belt buckle.

“Good point,” Cas said, completely ignoring the indigent noises coming from Dean’s throat. “I will not be able to penetrate you if you are still clothed.”

“Hey!” Dean yelped. “We never agreed you were going to top!”

Cas paused in his ministrations and pulled back a few inches. “You are correct, of course.” Cas cocked his head to the side in thought. “My research into the subject has told me that when two males vie for the position of dominate sexual partner, they grapple for it.” A slow blush climbed Cas’ cheeks. “Which is sometimes followed by more spanking.”

Dean stared at Cas as he thought out how any grappling was likely to go between the two of them—unless he could get his hands on some holy oil in the next ten seconds. Also, his ass was already twinging with pain, so he was all for avoiding a second round of _that_ embarrassment.

“Ok, you can top,” Dean said with bad grace. “But!” he snapped when Cas took that as permission to bowl him back over into the sheets. Cas pulled back enough to look him in the eye and waited for him to speak.

“But what, Dean?” Cas asked seriously, big blue eyes concerned and puppy soft.

“Let’s just…” Dean breathed into the space between them, “slow down for a minute. This ain’t a race, Cas. Well get there. Just…” Dean leaned forward and kissed him, let his tongue do his talking for him.

Cas hummed into the kiss, and Dean felt a shiver run down his back. Dean reached out and ran his hand through Cas’ hair, let the spikes and stubborn cowlicks play between his fingers until he got a firm grip on the back of Cas’ head and moved him where he wanted him, got the angle just right.

“Dean,” Cas breathed between one kiss and the next. “Dean, let me…” but he never got to what he wanted, instead just pushed one hand under Dean’s shirt to feel his ribs expand under his skin with each breath, moved the other down to grab Dean’s thigh, his knee, and pull it over his hip where he wanted it so they were in line to just…

Dean moaned as Cas surged against him, hot and hard and right there where he needed him.

“Yeah. Yeah, Cas, I think you got it,” he said with a laugh.

“I love your smile,” Cas said as his motions slowed and he stared with wide eyes. “Dean, I love your smile. It’s crooked, and you have that one funny tooth—“

“Thanks,” Dean said wryly.

“—And every time I see it, I just want to rub myself all over you so everyone will smell me on you and know you’re _mine._ ”

That was kinda weird, and Dean was chalking it up as a Weird Angel Thing, but it was also hot as hell and deserved some positive reinforcement so Dean got to work sucking his own mark into the skin high up on Cas’ neck.

“S’nice,” Cas muttered as he got back to thrusting rhythmically against Dean. “Keep going, keep doing that.”

“Kay,” Dean breathed before biting down at the meat between shoulder and neck and wringing a whine from Cas’ throat.

Then there was a flurry of movement as Cas got impatient again and tugged Dean’s shirt over his head with a ripping noise that said nothing good about it’s continued wearability. Dean, won over by the idea of more skin-to-skin action, scrabbled at Cas’s shirt in turn, rucking it up his chest before getting distracted. He latched onto one of his nipples with hungry teeth and Cas groaned beneath him and went loose and pliable; Dean took advantage to push him over onto the bed and climb over his stomach to perch.

Dean took a few panting breaths to stare down at the expanse of Castiel’s bare skin and adrenaline-blown pupils before getting back to work pushing the brunet’s shirt off and licking his way across the angel’s chest.

He felt Cas’ hands running over his knees, his thighs, up over his hips to grab the meat of his ass and back again, but he didn’t pay it much mind until a cold finger went where no cold finger should go.

“W-whoa, there,” Dean yelped, pushing up on his knees to get away.

Cas clamped down on his hip and pulled him back down. “Dean,” Cas said, voice aggravated, “stay still for a minute.”

“Oh yeah, that’s real romantic, Dude,” Dean griped as he forced himself to relax against Cas’ chest. Then he blinked and pushed up, “And where the hell did my pants go?”

“It would be romantic if you stopped _wriggling,_ ” the angel griped before leaning up and nipping chidingly at his bottom lip.

Dean gave one last wiggle—in protest—and then settled into the kiss. He sucked at his lips, licked his way into Cas’ mouth, and let Cas push one slick finger into his ass.

Dean groaned in discomfort, and Cas quirked his finger and said into his ear, “You like that, don’t you, sweetheart?”

Dean let his head fall onto the angel’s shoulder. Cas had totally heard the pizza man say that, and… Fuck it. He was gonna let Cas have this one. “Yeah, Cas,” he said as he kissed the skin in front of him. “Just hurry it up.”

Fingers two and three went easier if only because Dean got thoroughly distracted by a kiss and the grip Cas had gotten on his dick. Dean latched onto the brunet’s wrist to try and keep it where he wanted it as he rocked into the grip with a low, drawn-out groan.

“Roll over, Dean,” Cas said after a long few minutes, after Dean had actually started to enjoy the stretch and the sparks Cas’ fingers sent shooting up his spine.

Cas didn’t so much wait for Dean to roll onto his side as he toppled them both over until Cas was lying on top. Dean grinned up at the angel, teasing, “Impatient, huh, tiger?”

“I have been waiting nearly five years to be here with you, Dean,” Castiel said as he sank down between Dean’s thighs, the hallows of their hips pressing together.

Dean looked away as he felt his face darken in a blush. “Dude, I thought we agreed we were done with the chick flick moments,” he complained half-heartedly even as he spread his legs wider to give Cas room.

“I’m never going to be done with those moments,” Cas said seriously. “Not with you.”

“Arg!” Dean moaned, throwing his head back. “Just shut up and get on with it!”

Cas hesitated, torn between making his point and _making his point_ , but he clearly saw the sense in what Dean said because a moment later he was pushing his way inside Dean in one long, rough thrust.

Dean gasped and scrabbled for purchase against Cas’ back, his legs giving an involuntary jerk before hitching up to hook his ankles behind Cas’ back.

“This feels very good, Dean,” Cas panted into Dean’s neck. “I can, I can see why you enjoy engaging in intercourse so—“

“Shut the fuck up and move, Cas.” Dean demanded, fingers pressing into Cas’ shoulder blades in what would be bruises on anyone else. “Move!”

“R-right,” Cas said as his hip stuttered into a jerking rhythm. “Tell, oh fuck, tell me if you want me to stop.”

“You’d better _start_ if you don’t want me to take fucking over!” Dean grated as he rocked back against the other. Cas, used to taking Dean’s orders, set himself to the task.

Then it was just the harsh pants of damp breath between them, the steady slap of skin against skin, and though he would die before admitting it, the breathy little gasps Dean let out every time Cas slammed home.

Then Cas was moving again, changing position, pushing up on his elbows to stare down—but thank fuck, he was a fast learner and had figured out how to keep fucking into Dean as he did, pulling Dean’s hips up as he moved.

“W-what?” Dean said, only realizing his eyes had drifted closed as they snapped open to meet Cas’ brilliant blue ones.

“Nothing, I just,” Cas said as he bent lower, “I just need to…” He trailed off as his lips roamed over Dean’s chest, his stomach, his neck. “I want to kiss every freckle. I,” his voice was filled with awe, “I just, there’s so many.”

“I said no chick flick…” He groaned and ripped his hands off Cas’ back to grab at his hair and drag him back to his mouth. “Fuck, just kiss me, you asshole.”

He could feel Cas smiling against his lips.

Dean was smiling too.


End file.
